It got a little scary earlier when the tornado sirens were wailing, but sometimes I crave a rainy night. My whole life I’ve had these ‘cozy’ fantasies… I wish for rainy nights and very specific activities: a delicious dinner with rain falling on our tin awning (the kitchen is bright and happy with the dark and the cold rain tapping on the windows, fresh yellow flowers on the dinner table in a pitcher), a bubble bath, ticking stripe flannel pajamas, a great movie on the couch in a cozy dark room with Ben and a big quilt, cinnamon roll flavored coffee (inexplicable because I don’t even care for hot drinks), then a great book (think Dream When You’re Feeling Blue or A Moveable Feast, or books about Paris and New York in the fall) while Ben snores quietly beside me and the sound of the fan drowns out the thunder. I turn out the light and he rubs his feet against mine and says “Love you sweet girl”. In this fantasy, I fall asleep and think of how my pillow smells a little bit like my favorite soap. While I’ve been up working too late to enjoy most of these, I’m going to try the last part right now.
Thursday, May 20th, 2010